Sunday, September 13, 2015

Poets and Paradoxes


Photo Credit: science.howstuffworks.com
Déjà vu
A blank sheet and
an aching pen
thirsty for the truth.

Déjà vu
A God so kind
but a spineless mind

I only write 
what I should do.

Déjà vu
Time has passed
but pain, it lasts
‘cause a poet is but a fool.

Déjà vu
I’ve no life to wheel
so I write to heal,
yet my world never improves.

Déjà vu
My words have changed
but they mean the same:

My world is blue.

Déjà vu

Saturday, August 15, 2015

Mediocrity

I'm experiencing suffocating degrees of comfort.
But I'm struggling to understand the cause of my cozy respiratory failure.
My heartbeat is certainly present.
In fact, in the many moments I'm frozen still and staring into a space before me that isn't there… my heart knocks louder than the noise I left behind.

Perhaps I can breathe and I'm just choosing not to.
Yes. I'm holding my breath.
I'm waiting for something.
I don't know that I'd know it if it came but, I feel the need to wait.
I don't know that I ever want it to come because, I just want to wait.

Something is missing.
But I'm comfortable waiting. 
Only waiting.
Yes. This is fine.
I know how to be this.
I don't know how to be that.

I probably shouldn't keep asking them to love me for being that...
That which I am not.

I'm afraid of being that.

No. That's not it.

I'm afraid of failing to be that.
And if I succeed, I'd be afraid of failing to stay there.

But I'm terrified of staying as I am.
I don't want to be this.
I want to be that.

And them?
If they need a reason to love me, then they never will.

I want to be that.
But not for them.
I want to breathe for me.

Thursday, July 30, 2015

I Found in Me

The dust settled;
the wind no longer blew;
and I found in me,
what had grounded me
but, to my surprise,
it wasn't you.

Eloquence.
Punctured only
by streams of sunshine
and the soothing sounds
of intricate drums.

Fear.
… infused with faith
and peppered with love
for the simple pleasures:
sips of coffee interrupted
by glances at pages
of leather-bound treasures.

Romance.
A firm obsession
with sincere expressions,
and an utter devotion
to hope.

Kinks and curls
of a story to be told,
by an independent voice
of a woman...
daring to be bold.

These are the things
I found in me.

Friday, June 19, 2015

It Is Written

The pen politely asks my wrist to dance.

I wrap my parched fingers around its neck, and clench my fist to quench my thirst.

My mind never outgrows the delusion that my two realities are really one and the same because it finds comfort in the idea that it can escape one to embrace the other. As though it can never belong to any world without ever getting the feeling of simply having had enough. So I succumb to the promiscious pen and we tango down a line, as I lose my mind to gain what is mine:

...freedom only found in pages. 

With this barrel of ink bleeding past my fingertips, I lay you down: the manipulative, confused and confusing of my two worlds. I've lost my freedom to you but today I gain it back because, I bleed in colors and textures you can never wash away. I bleed blue and black, I bleed front and back, cursive and CAPS…

I bleed intact.

Thursday, May 28, 2015

int[rover]sion


There are brief moments of clarity in my clouds of mere existence. Most of the time I am uneasily staggering in the direction dictated by whatever wind is blowing hardest: deadlines, chores, people in need of attention. Once in a long while the winds fall silent, creating a brief moment without instructions as to where I should be or what I should be doing. It is in that fleeting span of time, I find, I'm most lucid.

I can see her at her clearest. She's no pretty sight but she is very familiar. And while she respects the powers of the winds, she is happiest when they do not blow. She is happiest not alone, but in the silences that punctuate her moments-with-company.

Friday, April 24, 2015

Word(s) to the Wise

I was propping myself up on the exam table at our University Health Services (UHS) when I noticed a troubling poster staring back at me. It read:

"Foreign travel is dazzling. Foreign disease is not. Travel Wise. Immunize here. Be safe there."

Do you see the problem there? Words are powerful, so let me break this down:


"Foreign travel is dazzling. Foreign disease is not." 

What exactly is "foreign disease"? Disease that can only exist in places outside of the USA? Disease that is unique to foreigners? "Foreign disease" separates non-Americans in a derogatory way. No disease is exclusively "owned" by foreigners. More importantly, is the implication here that "USA diseases" (whatever that may mean) are dazzling? No disease is dazzling.

"Immunize here. Be safe there." 

This suggests that immunization is only necessary when leaving America (which is a dangerous message to send), and secondly categorizes the rest of the world as a more dangerous place (when in truth there are several countries that outperform the USA in health indicators). Safety is not only a concern when leaving the USA. I can turn to any American news channel right now and give you 10-20 reasons why this is incorrect. Individuals should immunize based on the needs of the country they travel to because this may vary from the vaccination requirements for the USA; however there are immunization and safety concerns in any country--even if to varying degrees and types.

Now I'm all about constructive criticism so I've taken the liberty to draft a less offensive version:

"[all] Travel can be dazzling. Diseases never are. Travel Wise. Be safe and immunize wherever you are. "

Voila, UHS. There you have it. Now please take that thing down.


Update: I emailed my concerns to the Medical Director at the time and UHS has since taken the poster down. They were also extremely respectful in their response to my request. 

Monday, March 23, 2015

Story Sorting

I used to enthusiastically flounder my way through many conversations about The Godfather. I often said something like, "Al Pacino is a great actor" or, "It's a classic" or the awkward, "What scene was that? It's been so long, I don't remember the details". A couple of years ago, I decided to "refresh" my memory and watch it "again". To my shame, I realized that I had never seen it! I had just taken part in so many conversations about it, that I had convinced myself of my watching it as a child. Instead, I couldn't recognize a single scene. Needless to say, I was completely blown away by it.

Photo Credit: dailypaul.com
My favorite scene has to be after Michael returns from hiding and he's trying to win Kay back. He relates Kay's concerns about his family's business to that of any system involving power:
Michael: My father is no different than any powerful man, any man with power, like a president or senator.   
Kay: Do you know how naive you sound, Michael? Presidents and senators don't have men killed. 
Michael: Oh. Who's being naive, Kay?
There's this underlying ethical conflict that is carried through-out the movie. It deconstructs your ideas about good and bad by developing Michael's character to the point where you start to relate to him. At the end of the movie [spoiler alert], you'll find yourself fond of a new Don that just had the heads of all the other families killed, and ordered for his brother in law to be choked to death only to lie to his wife about it. It speaks both to how well the story was told and how complicated human nature really is.

While movies (and to a similar extent, books) are categorized by genre, I've found that it can be just as useful to categorize them by how they're told--as opposed to what they're telling. Consider my storytelling approach typologies:
  • Storytelling Using a Moral: This is probably where a lot of the movies that reach the box office would fit in. These movies focus on very simple and basic concepts like "good guy always wins" or "forgiveness is good" or "family is important". There's a moral or lesson in the story. Stories in this category also tend to be (while not always) very easy to follow and have nothing too complex in how they play out. Tyler Perry movies are a quintessential example.
  • Storytelling Using a Character: Some stories work primarily on character development. It's not so much that they don't have a "moral of the story" but it's more that it's not the ultimate focus. The Godfather is a perfect example. A lot of time is spent on showing the various elements to Michael Corleone's personality and motives. At the end of it, we don't have a clear idea of what we've learned but we're blown away nonetheless.
  • Storytelling Using a Philosophy: My brother helped me coin this one. These are stories that unfold to explore a concept. They don't have a strong focus on a lesson or a character. A great example is Cloud Atlas. I would also argue that The Matrix would fit well in this category too. Similar to the first two categories, it doesn't mean these stories are clear of any lessons or character developments but that its not the core of what they're about.
Like genres, there could be great overlap here but there's always one approach that will outshine the others. Many action movies tend to have elements of romance and/or drama, for instance, but they are labeled as action movies because that is the more prominent element. In some cases, romance might even be what is driving the action but we are still in agreement that the movie belongs in the Action aisle. In much the same way, the story telling approach is easy to detect because one--a moral, a character, or a philosophy--always stands out more. 

The US Educator's Role in the Lives of Undocumented Immigrants

There has been increasing federal resistance to supporting undocumented immigrants in the United States (e.g. last month it was the  DACA re...